FINALLY A FINALE

posted April 11, 2011

The end is nigh. (Yeah, that's right... "nigh!") We are only two days away from voting. Have your index fingers at the ready - ready to dip into that thick purple ink. Oh wait... that's not us. We don't have voter fraud to fret over in the States. It's not like anybody can hack or fix a voting computer.

The most talked about election in the history of elected attorneys will finally be answered. Will Peter "Captain Malfeasance" Florrick or Wendy "Miss Congeniality" Scott-Carr win the State's Attorney race? It's a dead heat. And we're dying for it to cool off... unless a new scandal comes along.

Could one of them have been a draft dodger? Maybe didn't inhale weed? Have a drinking problem? Maybe one has a learning disability and had a C-average in college? Maybe a shady real estate deal? No. That stuff is only good enough to get you the Presidency. This is the Cook County State's Attorney we're talking about - where you have to reach for the sky with hookers and nannies.

We'll find out come Tuesday night who, for the next four years, will justly lock away the criminals of our city. Because that's what they do, right? Or do they also have to turn on the Bat Signal?

Readers, who do you think will pull out the win?