CHEESE, PLEASE

posted November 21, 2011

We�re getting reports that the Cheese Heads (no, not those blasted Packer fans), but the heads of the Cheese and Dairy Guilds, are meeting in D.C. on an appeal to change the most recent food diagram from the plate back to the pyramid. Blessed are the cheese makers, for they have been moved off the chart completely.

See our artist's rendering below of what you know someone got paid tons to "design":


Yes, we were thrilled to get a chance to use Comic Sans

If a kid opens up a fridge, should he have a slice of red or should he heat up a slice of purple? Big Cheese is arguing that the pyramid was the right way to go � they were part of the actual chart and it had pictures! And as we know, these days, American kids can�t read, unless the words are pizza, ketchup, or Elmo.

Leading the way is the Big Cheese himself, Heather Farms CEO Walter Kermani, who is still trying to make up for the vomiting outbreak in a school cafeteria � originally thought to be listeria, but now suspected to be a result of the kids finding out Kim bought her own $2 million engagement ring.

Forget the plate. Forget the pyramid. Our crack design team here at Snark has come up with the perfect solution for our times. The Food Rhombus!


It kinda looks like a tray. Get it?

So readers, what other suggestions do you have for a new food diagram?